Behind every war is a guy who said, ‘Bro, trust me.’
🧠 Featuring Ned Neuron, who once tried to drill for oil in a kiddie pool.
I. Scene: The Middle East, 1920s–1930s
The British Empire was doing its usual thing:
Planting flags
Drawing borders with a ruler and a hangover
Claiming resources like it was colonial Amazon Prime
Meanwhile, America was chillin’.
Had money.
Had oil companies.
Had absolutely no colonial experience whatsoever.
But one company — Standard Oil of California (which would become Chevron) — looked at the map and went:
“What if we just… skipped the empire and bought the oil?”
Spoiler alert: It worked.
II. The British: “We’ve Got Iraq. We’ve Got Persia.”
At this point, Britain was sitting on:
Iraq’s oil fields
Iranian concessions (thanks to sketchy deals and cigar smoke)
BP’s ancestor, the Anglo-Persian Oil Company
Basically, they were the petroleum professors of empire.
But they ignored one key piece of sand on the board:
🟡 Saudi Arabia
Because in British minds, the place was:
“Just sand, swords, and tribes. No oil. No tea. No thanks.”
Chevron was like:
“Sounds cheap. We’ll take it.”
III. Abdulaziz Enters the Chat
Remember that dude who built a kingdom with 40 guys and a sword? (read here..)
Yeah — Abdulaziz ibn Saud.
He had a lot of land.
No oil.
No money.
And a line of people trying to sell him maps.
So when Chevron showed up with:
American geologists
A bag of cash
Zero British accents
He went:
“Finally, someone who brought snacks and didn't ask to rule me.”
In 1933, Abdulaziz signed a concession with Standard Oil of California.
He got money.
They got all the oil exploration rights in Eastern Arabia.
IV. Translation: Chevron Just Took a Whole Kingdom Off the Market
Imagine the British reaction:
“Wait wait wait... they did what with the sand?!”
By the time London realized what happened,
Chevron (earlier Standard Oil of California) was already building oil rigs and high-fiving camels.
The Empire — used to doing things by force — just got beat by a handshake.
V. The Oil Hits the Fan (Literally)
By 1938, oil comes gushing out of Dammam Well No. 7.
Turns out that "useless" Saudi sand?
✅ More oil than anyone expected
✅ Enough to power two World Wars (and a McDonald’s deep fryer)
✅ And it belonged to... the Americans now
Chevron had out-Britished the British —
No colonies.
No redcoats.
Just contracts and crude.
VI. Ned Neuron’s Notes:
Chevron’s geologists found oil by licking rocks (science!)
British spies tried to convince Abdulaziz it was all fake (lol)
The Saudis played both sides, but Chevron was already too deep (literally)
VII. The Legacy:
Saudi Arabia became America’s closest oil partner
Chevron went from gas station to oil dynasty
Britain? Still had tea... but lost the tanker
🧵 NEXT IN THE SERIES:
“The Day the Saudis Flipped the Oil Game:
How ARAMCO Went From American Project to Saudi Powerhouse”
Spoiler:
They didn’t need swords this time.
Just strategy, patience, and a whole lot of crude.
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